Happy Anniversary
I thought we weren't doing gifts this year!
I started this newsletter in August of 2020 because I didn’t want to journal. I have a hard time doing things for myself, without an audience. I think that’s because I was voted most likely to become President my senior year and so I operate like everything I do will be watched in 20 years when I’m running for office (I’m not.)
I started this newsletter because I wanted an outlet. At the beginning of last year the world was introduced to the novel coronavirus. It took 6 months of the pandemic for me to actually start this because I spent the first 6 months doing what everyone was doing; growing scallions in my window like a lonely maiden. In 6 months, I grew one eighth of a scallion, and I decided I wanted to do something that could possibly yield more fruitful results.
I started this newsletter as an escape from everything else you and I are reading all day. Not as an excuse to become ignorant or to use your privilege to stay out of politics, but just as a little walk for some fresh air. I’m assuming most of you reading this have stress in your life. Some of you have lost loved ones to covid and some haven’t seen your loved ones in a year. I know we’ve all been reading about the white terrorist in Georgia and it’s horrific. Not to ever compare myself to John Krasinski but I intended this blog to be some good news. Maybe not news, but some good feelings. I wanted to make this for myself and for my community to have a source of comfort, a source of release from the obvious and overwhelming sadness that accompanies nationwide loss and grief.
It’s mid March again, one year later. I’m taking tonight as a sort of rest stop, a reflection point. I’m here to pee and get Cool Ranch Doritos and I’ll be back to regularly scheduled programming next week.
March 13th 2020 I packed a small suitcase and drove home to Maryland. 24 hours later my dad became very sick with covid and at that point we knew almost nothing about it so it was very scary. To pass the time in (actual) quarantine, my little sister and I learned Tiktok dances in the basement and threw things towards our dog. I say it like this because I don’t want to mislead my readers into thinking Daisy knows how to play fetch. We throw small plush toys in her direction and whether she brings them back to us or not is entirely up to her. I’m not in the business of telling other women how to live their lives.
I think of PillowTown as my basement dance. A little retreat to break a sweat and relax, because sometimes so much is out of your control anyway. While my dad was sick upstairs, and with nothing to do but keep an eye on him and stay far away, Hannah and I took our mind off of things. Every night I was worried about his health and about what this pandemic would look like for the country, for the world, but in the present, I was watching Charli Damelio teach choreography.
Where are you now and where were you a year ago? Are you still making sourdough? My mom and my sister still are. Jackie has concocted her own signature flour blend and my mom is worried her starter will die during Passover. Are you still doing couch to 5k? This is a question for me, and the answer is no. I wanted to use my first few months living back home to get in better shape and become a runner, but I quickly realized that a global crisis does not imply a term of self-betterment. Staying alive and sane is enough. I’m working on the sanity part.
So, friends and family, thank you for taking a deep breath with me. I hope that many of you reading this are vaccinated or will be able to get it soon. Hopefully when we’re all vaccinated you can all make it to my improv show. You won’t have any excuses. In fact, if after a year inside you STILL don’t want to come see me do live skits in a Bushwick basement with my Oberlin and or NYU friends, then I’ll know you got covid and lost your sense of taste.
Thank you for reading this far, if you have. I feel like I’m always thanking you for reading a thing you voluntarily signed up for. Is that insecure of me? Sorry, am I assuming too much? It’s women’s history month and I’m just trying to not take up too much space in my own blog. I took two birth control pills on Monday and the next day saw a toddler in rainboots and cried. Things are looking up for me, for us. We have to look up because there are rats on the ground and that’s just a day ruiner. Happy Thursday/Friday morning, PillowHive. Eat something good today.